She had the makings of a great life. Her and her sister were adopted when Kim was 4 years old. Her adoptive parents were great people and provided a loving home for Kim, however, even the best childhood can’t always keep your kids sailing straight. She had started smoking marijuana at a young age, but that wasn’t where it stopped. With relationships come influences, and when she started dating a meth addict, she jumped onboard. She didn’t know it at the time, but the ship she just jumped on was sinking, and she was going down with it.
With a one-year-old in tow from a previous relationship, and now with an escalating meth addiction, “it was like the lights were on, but nobody was home,” she described. She was going through the motions at first, but meth is a tricky substance. At first you think you are in control of it, but before you know it, you’re spending more time with the drugs than you are with the things that really matter. That’s when it has you, and it had Kim. She became pregnant a second time, but it was apparent that she was in no shape to keep the child. DHS stepped in when the baby was one week old, and they took the baby and her one and a half-year-old toddler. Both were eventually adopted out.
She was staying with some kind people that just wanted the best for her, but when they realized how far gone she was, they issued an ultimatum. Get clean or get out. Without her children though, she had lost the will to stay clean. She didn’t want to remember and didn’t want to live in her reality anymore. It was easier to numb the pain then live with it. So, she moved out, and with no place to go, took to the streets. She couldn’t hold down a job, but wanted to stay high, so she started selling drugs to support her habit. She was taking on more water than she could handle; her small ship, drifting out in the ocean, was desperate to stay afloat. It was then that the storm came swirling in over the horizon.
Her boyfriend was in jail, facing serious prison time. She found a new man though, also an addict, and soon she became pregnant. She wanted this time to be different. She knew the pain that came with having her children taken away because of her choices. She knew she couldn’t keep repeating her mistakes, but the storm was raging now. Her fragile ship had taken on too much, and it was sinking. Then the final blow came: intent to distribute. That was what they charged her with, and she was sentenced to two years. Now was her time to try harder. She had to. She got sober, despite the fact that drugs were much easier to get access to inside the prison system. She remained clean throughout the rest of the pregnancy and when the baby was born, the father stepped in and took custody. In the devastating aftermath of her choices, she went back to using, but the relapse would be short-lived. There was a life preserver onboard the ship, and just when it felt like all hope was lost, Jesus tossed that ring out and pulled her in. There in her prison jump suit, she found Jesus Christ and eternal salvation. She said she could almost hear him tell her, “You might be behind bars, but I’m going to free your soul.” She got clean, and she’s stayed cleaned for 29 months.
Since being released, she came to Gospel Rescue Mission. Her daughter is here in Muskogee, and while this isn’t where she’s from, she wants to stay here to be close to her. “You can just feel God here,” she said about GRM, as she told us about her faith. The father of her daughter got clean while she was serving her time, and he’s been very good to their daughter, who’s now two years old. Although her ship had been broke to pieces and completely sank, through God’s restoring love for her, she is rebuilding a new and better ship. She can feel God telling her, “I got you.” She is currently putting applications out and looking for employment. Before she fell into addiction, she had worked as a CNA, and although she has a felony on her background, her goal is to get it expunged and get back into the medical field.
A lot goes into rebuilding, and even though she’s just getting started, God is her rock, and that’s a whole lot better of a place to start.